I am plain exhausted. EXHAUSTED. I have spent the better part of the day with a very fussy baby. I'm sure she isn't feeling well still, but finally today she is sounding better. We seemed to have made some serious progress with her sleeping and eating in the past two weeks and all the sudden, the last two days we have taken some big steps in the backward direction. I am emotionally and physically drained. It almost feels like when we first brought her home from the hospital...the type of exhaustion I feel. Up over and over in the night, constant nursing, crying every time I put her down and just bursting into tears for no apparent reason (both of us). I am sure this will pass and things will get back to "normal" and we will continue to make progress. I really hope I can just chalk all this up to her being sick this week.
Today I have been pooped on, peed on, puked on, screamed at, hit, clawed, and kicked. And then I have been smiled at and I wonder why in the world something so precious can be such a bear. For some reason, it seems as if she behaves differently with me than anyone else. She will have two or three good naps for my mom or Nathan, but doesn't want to sleep for me...especially without nursing to sleep. It's so frustrating and I wonder if I've started some bad habits with her that are going to be hard to break. I was really hoping that she would consistently be in her own bed by the time we go to Nashville in a few weeks, but I'm not sure if that will be realistic or not.
I am so ready to lose this baby belly, but in order to do that, my baby has to actually let me put her down so I can exercise or make a good meal!
OK, I am done. Whew! Nathan took her so that I could take a long shower and paint my toenails. It's amazing what a little red nail polish can do. Let's pray for a good night's sleep tonight!
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Oh, Koren. I'm so sorry. I know the spot you're in EXACTLY. I remember it vividly! Everyone else could get Drew to nap for hours, but NOT ME. Everyone else could get him to sleep in 3 minutes. NOT ME. I had to nurse him to sleep until he was almost a year old! He acted differently with me than anyone else. I tried to chalk it up to him liking me more. LOL Nevertheless, it was frustrating!
ReplyDeleteAnd I still have so many days where I run out of the room, close the door before Drew runs in behind me, and cry for a good 2-3 minutes because I'm tired of being peed on, kicked, punched, bitten, pulled, stepped on, and screamed at. I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL and I'm so sorry. It's a tough, tough spot.
When I have tough days, I just remind myself this is my calling in this season of life and thankfully, "this too shall pass." Thank goodness for God's grace & mercy because on these types of days, we moms really need it.
I hope you guys get some good sleep tonight...or at least as uninterrupted as possible. Love you, girl! Chin up!
Caroline is a pretty well adjusted baby - and every now and then, we have weeks just like this. She won't let me put her down for 2 seconds! It is one those days that I pull out the sling. It's either the sling or my hair! So I usually choose the sling. But then a few days later she'll go back to her happy, content self. I meant to tell you but forgot - the biggest thing that helped Caroline start sleeping at night was a consistent routine and bedtime. I was really against bedtimes for a while because I knew it would make things more difficult for us to be able to go to church or go grocery shopping, etc. But it certainly helped out in the sleep department! If you don't have a routine and bedtime, try that! It definitely helps.
ReplyDeleteI hope you get some much needed rest soon. I know how you feel! I'm so sorry!